Posted By Jeff on January 27, 2009
I guess you could go bid somewhere north of $3.8 million for the privilege of deflowering the woman currently known as Natalie Dylan, and hope that she chooses you from among the other wealthy gentlemen allegedly vying for her favors.
Or you can just hop over to her page at the web site of Dennis Hof’s World Famous Bunny Ranch, book an appointment, show up and negotiate your party fee in a brothel bedroom, like anyone else.
I have nothing — absolutely nothing — against currently-known-as-Natalie selling her virginity. But I do have something against bad journalism and I’ve watched in horrified fascination for the last two weeks or so as the media has turned “Natalie Dylan” into a celebrity vagina, a flash point in the culture wars.
- Natalie Dylan is not her real name. We know that. Yet the media, from the lowliest blogger on up to CNN, has swallowed her story whole. “Never let the truth get in the way of a good story,” seems to be the editorial standard of the day.
- The “Natalie Dylan” story has been largely created by, and for, Howard Stern, the Bunny Ranch and the tabloids. That doesn’t mean that the story isn’t true … but anyone with a skeptical bone in his-or-her body (Tina Brown, I mean you) ought to have been wondering out loud, from the start, whether this was, more likely than not, the Great Virginity Prank of ’09.
I was mostly minding my own business this morning when I ran across the latest on Ms. Dylan in The Frisky: Recession Special: Virgin for Sale. It turned out I was just one click away from booking an appointment with Natalie! (If that page is gone, here’s the screenshot. So I booked an appointment, of course … how could I not? The “Virginity for Sale” poster child is featured as one of the “over 500 ladies working at the Bunny Ranch.”
Maybe she’s only doing oral sex and hand jobs, for now? Technically, her virginity would be intact, by contemporary standards.
Anyway, we’ll see what I can afford. Saturday, Feb. 7 is my first choice. Friday the sixth and Sunday the eighth are my backups. I’m sure I can fit a trip to the Bunny Ranch into my busy schedule.
Almost immediately after booking my appointment (They didn’t need a credit card, thank goodness) I heard back from the proprietor of the Bunny Ranch hisself!
You’ve reached the World Famous BunnyRanch home of the HBO’s smash hit CATHOUSE. The BunnyRanch has been providing legal and safe sexual services since 1955. We pride ourselves in bringing you the finest ladies from around the world including Playboy Playmates, Penthouse Pets, Hustler Honeys and over 300 XXX Stars.
Hello, I’m Dennis Hof the Owner of the Moonlite BunnyRanch. I would like to thank you for booking your appointment ahead of time with NatalieDylan. Your message is sent directly to her. Please let me know if she does not contact you to verify the dates. Please don’t hesitate to contact us with any questions or concerns at the address below.
Natalie has not yet gotten back to me but I have no doubt she will, knowing how the Bunny Ranch prides itself on good customer relations.
If Natalie does manage to get a stiff price and a book deal for her first act of sexual intercourse, I’ll stand in line with everyone else and congratulate her. The joke would be on the skeptics, like me.
But I’ll congratulate her a little more, even, if this whole thing is just a hustle, which I suspect it is. If she just wants to be a high-priced working girl for a bit and go back to grad school, she’s probably got it made; and good for her, even if it means she’s busy on Feb. 7 and I can’t play the “Like a Virgin” game with her.